Sisterfriends,

Know the Difference.

In my last letter, I spoke about how sometimes it can be hard for me to be transparent and vulnerable. Although seemingly more and more people are getting comfortable telling their story, I find these interactions to be a little suspect, especially in one being so open to voicing such intimate details of their life to any and everyone.I consider myself to be an amazing friend, in part because I want amazing friends. I believe the old adage “If you want good friends, BE a good friend.” I believe being a great listener is a quality of being an amazing friend. I have listened to a great number of people tell their story as well as share their story. The one take away I’ve learned, is knowing the difference between the two. When I hear people telling their story or the conversation is prefaced with “Let me tell you my story”, It usually comes from a place of pity and manipulation. A victim victimizing. Nothing positive comes out of it, at least for the person listening. It’s akin to being a human trash can. Telling your story’s end goal isn’t to make progress, heal and escort someone else into a place of healing. It is completely self-serving.

On the other hand, when I hear someone say I want to share my story with you, or I’m sharing my story with you…my ears perk up and I lean in. I sense a light at the end of the tunnel, this too shall pass relatability, an extended hand. It’s organic. I know it’s coming from a place of victory and encouragement. It’s Grandma seasoned with Grace. It’s healing manifested and a powerful progression forward for all who are fortunate to hear it. I believe it is answered prayers.

Sharing your story not only lends itself to the power of Grace, the power of God. It changes lives and generations for the better. It creates warriors and not victims. It gives, it does not take. Allow Grace to take over and watch the impact of sharing your story.